I am since one week in Germany. Munich – Erlangen – Bamberg – Gunzenhausen.
(the picture is obviously not from this trip. Was 2014 in London, just some days after I started working for Siemens again after my 6 month in Sri Lanka. I still miss living outside and hearing the palm leaves moving from the wind…)
Munich was still sunny, Erlangen and Bamberg rain and now in Gunzenhausen the weather is undecided I would say. First time I personally recognized what impact the missing light has on me. It’s a bit like a cosy curtain that makes you wanna stay in bed and read, sleep and cuddle.
It somehow fits to my current inward oriented state. I think I can call it a crisis by now. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it has made its way into my thoughts that this is what’s happing right now. And since some months already if I am really honest with myself. It is a constant search for me to find out what I really stand for, who I am and what impact I want to have. Deep in me, there is an idea since many year but its covered up by fear, must, don’t, can’t. Every coaching circle takes me to another page of my book of life. As if all pages have a small whole through which I can see where I am heading to, but there is always something else.
I spend some time on my fears during coaching in the last months and I try to integrate them much more than fight them. Acceptance, self love and forgiveness are for me better ways than fighting them. They wake up with me or they visit me in my dreams – so I decided to welcome them and try to find ways to let them be.
I am just now thinking how weird all of this must sound 🙂 But hej, that’s part of the journey, right? I am figuring things out and I am far from perfect but I am getting closer to me.
Wish you all a wonderful weekend!